Rushing

When a book is extremely good to me I have a tendency to wanna rush to the end of the chapter or the end of the book sometimes. Inevitably, what happens to me then is that I have to back track because I missed some pertinent information that ties the whole story together, and because I missed it I am left confused about so and sos part in the plot. I am noticing that same pattern of behavior in my relationships. If it is good to me I wanna rush to the good part(not merely physical) and I(we) miss out on vital things that would make the relationship that much stronger.

I am very conscious of time. How long it should take to do something, being on time and many different things of that nature. This being said, I have always felt I was doing my meditations "wrong" because it was hard for me to "sit still"for 10, 15 or 30 minutes. My mother once lost a bet with my aunt that I couldn't sit still and keep quiet for 5 minutes, and so the seed was planted and the habit in place... "That boy just just can't sit still"... While having a conversation with a very good friend yesterday it was "rebrought" to my attention to start with 30 seconds or a minute and go from there. This made perfect sense, but what even worked "better" for me after some more thought is doing smaller meditations and moments of silence throughout the day. It worked wonderfully for me yesterday(and this morning)! I was much more focused and able to relax when I took those moments as they came and went into stillness instead of worrying about one large chunk. Which then reminded me of something I said to someone earlier in the week. God doesn't recognize time. Time is a man made construct. If my purpose of meditation and stillness is to connect to God(which it is) then length of time should not matter over quality.